What did it feel like going makeup free for a week? Well, let’s first start with why I even began this journey. I recently had an experience where I was judging my own mother- I know sounds horrible. Honestly, I feel bad even writing it. I was at church and I saw my mom and my first thought was, oh she isn’t wearing makeup. Now, my mom definitely doesn’t wear makeup all the time and doesn’t even wear a lot. She has amazing skin and is naturally gorgeous. However, whenever you go to church you put your face on- or at least that’s what I thought. I remember seeing her and thinking why aren’t you wearing makeup? Are you starting the trend like many women as they age and just go bare faced? I was concerned she wasn’t taking care of herself. Fast forward a couple of days later and I found out she couldn’t wear makeup for a while because she had a procedure done on her eyes. As you can imagine I felt horrible! What kind of daughter judges her own mother for not wearing makeup, but secondly what type of daughter does it after her mom has gone through several eye treatments? Well apparently me.
It got me thinking really hard. What is my relationship with makeup? Why did I feel the need to care if my mom was wearing makeup or not? Better yet, does makeup define my appearance? These are questions I really sat with for a while. Then I started to realize I didn’t like what my answers were. Who do I blame for these feelings of judgment on myself and others? Society, associations with family and friends and growing up reading the latest fashion and style magazines. Now I’m not trying to point fingers but I do want to bring to light these 3 areas as I feel they do affect us more than we realize.
Society- We see it on TV all the time, women who are successful put their makeup on in the morning and look put together before going to work. I mean do you really see successful women trotting into the office with no makeup? Maybe you do- which is great! But often I find we are portrayed that successful women put themselves together (hair and makeup) and unsuccessful women don’t. I even recently heard someone saying on social media how we should make sure we’re taking time to get our makeup on because we want to look good for our husbands and it sets the tone for the day. If my husband’s love is based on me getting my makeup on for the day, then is it even love?
Family/Friends- How you grow up obviously has a big effect on how you see the world. You may have grown up with a mom who never would go anywhere without makeup, you hardly knew what she looked like without it. Your friends started wearing makeup early on, and so you followed suit. You realized you got more attention from guys when you wore makeup, you felt accepted by your peers. Maybe your dad only complimented you when you had makeup on.
Fashion/Style Magazines- Yes, magazines. The power of magazines is real and I’m living proof. I remember I loved flipping through them as a teenager(keep in mind these are crucial formative years). Those glossy, perfectly polished photos called to me! I want my skin to look like that, I wanted that lip color for my lips, and I realized my eyelashes could use a boost. What really happened as I was perusing the latest magazines was the fact that I wasn’t measuring up. Mmm…sounds almost like social media these days! I realized I needed makeup in order to look like all the pretty models in the magazine. It could make me feel complete.
So here’s what I did…I went makeup free for a week. No makeup touched my skin. I was bared faced for everyone. It didn’t matter what was on my calendar. I want to share my takeaways and what I learned in the process about myself.
- My skin actually looked so much better after a week of no makeup. It was clearer, healthier looking and less congested.
- I saved time getting ready each morning.
- I realized my identity was oddly tied up in “putting my face on” each morning. In the past if I didn’t put my face on then I was staying at the house all day and wearing lululemon pants. But when you are going to meet up with friends and you’re not wearing any makeup…things start to feel different.
- I felt like I needed to explain to people I wasn’t wearing makeup- why? This was a weird realization. I noticed it first with my hubs and then on Instagram…it was so odd that I felt the need to almost apologize for not wearing makeup!
- Although my face felt clean, I didn’t feel completely put together. It was like I kept forgetting something.
- I realized how much my focus is on my appearance sadly.
- It was weird to do my hair and wear nice clothes but not wear makeup…like I had all the pieces but one.
- I kept thinking throughout the week, I wonder if people think I’m just not trying or caring for myself?
As you can see I had a lot of realizations as I went through this no makeup journey. Realizations I wasn’t necessarily proud of. But my hope is that by being vulnerable with you, it will cause you to take a deeper look at why you paint your face each day. It’s not that makeup is bad or the enemy. But the immense value and weight we place on it in our lives. I don’t want my girls growing up thinking makeup is needed for beauty. Beauty is so much deeper than that. Makeup is fun and I enjoy trying new lipsticks and color palettes! I don’t intend to stop. However, I will go days without wearing it, and being barefaced when it might seem uncomfortable. If I want my girls to embrace themselves fully, then I must first embrace myself. Flaws and all.
Beauty is not painted nails, a perfectly toned body, or wearing the latest makeup product. Sure those are pretty things but beauty is so much deeper. Beauty is seeing my daughter pick out her outfit for the day and wearing it proudly even when it doesn’t match. It’s seeing my Gracie Girl giggle at her sister. It’s watching my hubs sing my girls to sleep. Trust me, I ‘m not trying to get all mushy. But I’m trying to paint a picture of what beauty really is. It’s not the fake, the fluff or the exterior. It’s the simple things we see everyday that are truly beautiful. As a natural beauty blogger it’s important I share this message with my daughters. Makeup has it’s place as a fun hobby. But it’s not have it’s place as part of who I am. I’m not going to stop wearing makeup- no not at all. I’ve just become more aware of what I don’t want it to be and where it’s place is in my life. The minute I feel I’m not who I am without it, is the minute I need another makeup detox week to realign my true values.
Let’s stop letting society decide what beauty is and let’s make our own definition.
Have you found yourself ever wrestling with these thoughts? If you want my full skincare routine, check it out here!